Framework

Photo credit: http://timberframehq.com

Imagine building your own house.  Notice that you may need to pause for a moment before even reading this sentence just to complete the picture in your mind.  As you think about the process of building the house you slowly get a picture of what house you are building.  Is it a nice house?  What is a nice house to you?

Continuing that thought, think about someone you really admire building a house next to you.  Chances are he or she has similar features of the nice house you are thinking.  And if not, believe that it has some similarities in one way or another, and you realize that your imagination will find its way to make it so, especially when you truly believe it.

Every house has a frame, and that frame has to exist in the mind of the designer, and the completed house will ALWAYS follow that frame.  Now if you’ve guessed it at this point, the framework I’m referring to is a metaphor of the concepts you hold in your mind; that whatever you say or do or even get, it will always fit into that frame and everything else that doesn’t fit is put out of the picture.  It could be in the form of rejecting other people’s opinions or declining a job offer simply because you don’t like it.

Our life experiences determine what our mental framework is.  The quality of our relationships is a reflection of that framework.  The results we get in our life help us determine if that framework is effective, and we know it based on how we feel about our results, good or bad.  If you are honest with yourself to admit that there are some bad points, then don’t worry.  That framework can be altered just like how metal is malleable.  Like a metal bar, it takes some effort to bend it, and bending it back and forth too many times will cause stress that is enough for it to break into two.  That is the learning process.  You make mistakes but learning from those mistakes will help you find your rhythm, and you become more and more efficient in your decision-making.

Are you satisfied with your current framework?  If yes, build on it.  If not, then you know what to do.

 

Life Lessons Learned (10 most essential concepts that guide me in my life)

*Picture and quote not mine

1. My Life Equation:  Humility + Gratitude = Growth

If you are HUMBLE, it follows that you acknowledge another person’s opinions.  If you are HUMBLE, it follows that you are OPEN-MINDED and open to LEARNING.  If you are GRATEFUL, it follows that you have a POSITIVE outlook on life.  If you are GRATEFUL, it follows that more people will LIKE you.  If you are HUMBLE and GRATEFUL, you will definitely GROW.  If you are HUMBLE and GRATEFUL, you are a FORCE of GOOD.

2. Affirmation of Learning – What it means is a feeling of confidence that whatever information you capture (e.g. by reading a chapter of the book), no matter how small. This eliminates the FEAR of missing out.  It boosts certainty.

3. Forcing your will on someone won’t get you anywhere.  Dictators fail and they fail miserably.

4. Forcing your opinion on someone won’t get you anywhere either unless you want to make enemies.

5. (relates to 3&4) INFLUENCE is the key to living a better life in a reality where we coexist with other people, whether we like it or not.

6. The feedback loop concept, which is either a positive loop or a negative one.  Be mindful of feedback.  Playing around your thoughts can make you perceive your circumstances in a positive light, which will most likely yield action and results that will also be perceived as positive, and so on.

7. The moment I realized that I stopped feeling sorry for myself, in which I made this anthem.

“I stopped blaming, I started learning

I stopped hoping, I started doing

I stopped envying, I started praising

I stopped criticizing, I started understanding

I stopped losing, I started WINNING”

8. We can’t understand miracles and how they happen. We can’t understand in our intellectual mind that there are things beyond our current way of thinking and understanding. That if we just let go and if we allow ourselves to accept these possibilities in our lives, we will experience these miracles ourselves.  That which stops us to do so are our self-limiting beliefs.

9. Mental Models – for intelligent decision-making

10. Conscious Mind (10%) contains our willpower, the PUSH factor we need to do something.  The Subconscious Mind (90%) contains our core beliefs, the PULL factor that dictates our actions towards the results of our beliefs, without any conscious effort necessary.  Just imagine if you have conflicting thoughts and see which thought wins.

*More to come in the future.  Let’s keep growing!

The Shadow of the Back of Your Mind

I learned a certain idea from Bob Proctor, wherein Fear overrides our consciousness and prevent us from doing what we ought to do.  And that fear itself causes Worry and Doubt.  I also learned from Tony Robbins that without Certainty, we don’t get to Act, and it is only through action that we get Results.  In the end, it’s really the results that matter, isn’t it?

In our life, we are bestowed upon a multitude of beliefs which affect how we look at our world.  We may have gotten it from our parents, teachers, friends, or even formed by our own thinking through our life experiences.  But some of these beliefs are the reason why we have these fears, worries, and doubts, and that they are the reason why the things we want in life are but a fleeting dream.  Unfortunately, in times we are bombarded with everyday life’s demands; preparing for an exam, working on a day job, or being a parent to many children, we barely have any time to think carefully about all these beliefs that we hold.  It would sound like too much trouble to think about these “petty things” and we just focus on getting through the day.  Imagine trying to cut a tree with a saw without pause for 30 minutes and yet you’re barely getting halfway through the trunk.  And then imagine what would have happened if you took short breaks instead of spending that full 30 minutes, and used that free time to sharpen the saw.  How much time and effort would you have saved?  This “Sharpen the Saw” metaphor is actually one of “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” which is one of the best self-help books to date, even considered by some people as a Business book under Leadership.

What I’m trying to say is that you may be living your daily lives ineffectively or inefficiently because you carry these fearful and doubtful beliefs in mind when you could have done something about it by taking a step back and thinking it through.  You may say that you have tried at some point but it didn’t matter in the end, and thus it reinforced the cynicism you have.  But really, it’s not like you have tried everything already, right?  So what’s the solution?

Bob Proctor mentioned that the reason for Fear is Ignorance, and knowing that the opposite of ignorance is Knowledge, the best way to counter fear is to really address that ignorance through Learning.  If you don’t read books, it’s not too late to try.  He also says that if your way isn’t working, you might as well try another way, one that may not necessarily be one that works perfectly, but is different enough for you to learn from the experience.  Be Open-minded and have a Growth Mindset.  Realize that as you learn new things, fear becomes Courage, doubt becomes Faith, and worry becomes Certainty.  It all starts with having the time to really think about yourself and the current mindset you have.  Obviously, addressing all issues at the same time is a complex task, so might as well start with the most obvious one.  Find out if there is anything you Desire, and identify as many beliefs associated with it.  If the belief carries with it any fear, worry, or doubt, then bingo!  You are one step closer to unraveling the shadow of the back of your mind, your subconscious programming.  Keep in mind, though, that whatever you have discovered may just be a small part of a bigger discovery, so don’t stop now and you’ll be amazed at the possibilities.  You may have hit gold, but you can still hit diamond!

So what does the shadow of the back of your mind represent?  Does it represent the obscurity of beliefs which carry your fears, your worries, and your doubts?  Or does it represent the untapped potential of your mind to drive such beliefs away and replace them with new empowering ones?  Go ahead, explore the shadows and see for yourself.

Pot of Duality – My take on Ethics

*picture above is a property of Yu-Gi-Oh Trading Card Game, picture for reference only

 

We humans are living beings capable of doing good and evil, and how we act affects the whole world in some way.  But what makes our actions good or evil?  We have moral standards that evolve over time, and yet we still haven’t reached a point where everyone agrees on a universal single standard.  We probably never will, but I have been thinking of a set of principles that are not based on a particular belief system, but the context still revolves around human, animal, and environmental welfare.  By the way, I’m a Roman Catholic by religion. Also, I did not enroll Theology or Philosophy in University but rather Accounting, therefore I have limited knowledge on the subject and expect the biases coming from those.

Nevertheless, I give you my personal framework for assessing the fate of civilization (yes, I think that deep) based my own interpretation of the standards of good and evil.  The premise is that we act towards one of two extremes, one that fits the definition of evil in which I refer to as “Destructive/Selfish Tendency,” and the polar opposite in which I refer to as “Preservative/Selfless Tendency.”  A middle ground would be impossible to measure at this point.

Destructive – Selfish Tendency <—–your action—–> Preservative – Selfless Tendency

Traits:

Pride <————————————————-> Humility

Sloth <————————————————-> Industriousness

Lust <————————————————–>  Self-denial

Greed <————————————————>  Generosity

Envy <————————————————->  Contentment

Wrath <———————————————–>  Forgiveness

Gluttony <——————————————–>  Abstinence

In a social perspective, my definition of destruction is the deprivation of one’s right or well-being for the survival, comfort, or pleasure of another.  The environmental perspective of destruction also boils down to how many sentient beings are negatively impacted to satisfy one’s whims.

The main argument here is that in every situation if we exercise traits that fall under “Destructive – Selfish Tendency,” then we have pushed the balance of the world towards its demise, whereas if we exercise traits under “Preservative – Selfless Tendency,” then we have done the opposite.  But the reality is much more complex than that.  There are words like “necessary evil” or “creative destruction” which suggest a mix between the two.  Also, there are multiple perspectives in which the situation is assessed, whether it is an individual perspective, a family perspective, an environmental perspective, or a global perspective.  To address this complexity, I would weigh it based on an estimate of how much was “destroyed” versus how much was “preserved/created,” and I assess it in different perspectives before I make a final judgment.  With this concept in mind, would you be able to tell if it is ethical to kill animals for food, or to cut trees for paper, or to destroy forests in favor of housing?  Since we don’t live in a perfect world, our desire to do good can’t be manifested in pure form, but it can be optimized by creating/preserving more while destroying less.  Throughout history, we have been familiar with the concept of “sacrifice,” while its application varies from religious practices to warfare.

Now think about the billions of people in existence on this planet and imagine what things they are doing right now with relation to creation/preservation and destruction.  For some people, they actually see that there is more destruction, which gives them that bias for action.  I personally see it this way, and I feel the need to “restore” the balance in my own circle of influence through spreading conscious awareness.  I believe that simply condemning others is a cheap tactic, or undermining others’ beliefs in the guise of constructive criticism.  Why not start with some rapport?

I believe this basic framework enables us to tell how much of our environment and our society will destroy or preserve itself based on the weighted average action of all human beings, whether it’s towards the destructive side or the creative/preservative side.  If it is as clear as this, then it should be a worthy quest to move that average towards the “good” side by influencing people one by one.  Afterall, good people don’t just show up conveniently.

Do you have any particular cause you believe in?

The Power of Perception

“We don’t see the world as it is, we see it as we are”

― Anaïs Nin

You know, it is rather amazing how quotes like these blow our minds; how the arrangement of already familiar words creates a whole different meaning that pierces through our consciousness.  It is like waking up all of a sudden from a deep sleep and feeling very differently.  Such words tap into an uncharted territory that exists in our mind.  Where exactly?  I don’t know.  But I know–YOU know, that it’s there.  That feeling of awareness opened our mental “flood gates” which have been storing deep reservoirs of unclean water, revealing something that was previously invisible but has been there all the time.  It is something new, and it is something that’s not.  What is it then?  What did we see?  Was it our world?  Or was it ourselves?

Do take note that I used the word “see” because we think in pictures.  The perception of the thought depends on how we see the picture.  The flow of space and time where this phenomenon is taking effect is measured on a different continuum, it cannot be measured by the second or meter or gram as we know them, but how we think of it simply defines it.  If you complicate it, it becomes complicated; if you simplify it, it becomes simple.

Take breathing as an example.  We all know that breathing is an automatic bodily function.  We don’t even have to think about it and yet we are doing it.  But what happens if you pay attention to it?  We become aware that we are breathing, and all of a sudden it loses automation!  And just like that, the unconscious act of “breathing” suddenly changed into a conscious interchange between “inhaling” and “exhaling.”  Why did something unconscious turn into something conscious?  And yet, we were talking about the same thing.  All it took was a change in perception, a paradigm shift.

Let’s compare these two people:  John is a salesman who is earning a sustainable income and is already satisfied with what he’s making, while Peter is an accountant who is also earning a sustainable income but is completely dissatisfied with it.  Both of them have sustainable income, but they see it differently.  Now, can you guess who is more likely to out-earn who in the future, assuming they currently earn about the same?  The answer would be the one who would do things differently to earn more money and achieve higher cash flow, which in this case, is Peter.  There is absolutely no certainty if he will indeed surpass the income of John, but if he sees this dissatisfaction as an opportunity to find more income sources, and makes the right decisions, he is more likely to out-earn him, and end up way happier and more satisfied in the process.  I mentioned that there is no certainty that Peter will make more money than John, and I did not mention what specific actions will have to be taken in order for him to do so, which adds up to the degree of uncertainty.  This is why only a few tend to act like Peter, while most tend to act like John.  Also, people are afraid to make the wrong decisions, as they will be perceived as failures.  Nobody likes to fail, but nobody likes to be perceived as a failure even more.  Dissatisfaction is actually a creative state that is critically important to our success, but if we don’t think of it this way, it doesn’t push us to act differently.

Without a particular objective in mind, we tend to dismiss anything new that we think of as just random thoughts passing by.  But when we are working towards a particular goal, every new idea suddenly becomes valuable, especially when they help achieve the goal faster.  We think of these instances as moments of inspiration, but they really are just the same forms of thought perceived differently, all because of having a goal in mind.  Now, who doesn’t want to feel inspired?  If you think about it, you can actually see why the people who have definite goals and purposes tend to be more inspired compared to those who do not have any, and those who are inspired tend to exert more effort and are more successful than those who are not.  Therefore, it’s time we rethink about our hopes and dreams, as well as our goals!

So how do you see the world around you right now?  How do you see the circumstances affecting your perception in life?  If they give off thoughts that inspire you, then you might as well be on the right track to your own personal fulfillment.